Spiderleg's Song
by Opaque Opal
Summary: Oneshot songfic set before the Power of Three series. As a Gathering is held, Leopardstar informs the Clans of a song Twoleg kits sing frequently. But what happens when Cloudtail makes a connection between the song and Spiderleg? Please R&R!


**A/N: Yet another random idea I had for a oneshot. Hope you enjoy it!**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Simpsons or Warriors. But if I did, I'd be filthy rich.

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It was a warm summer's night on Littlepine Island, as it was called by the Twolegs. The full moon shone brightly in the ebony sky and the stars that made up Silverpelt sparkled. Firestar, Leapordstar, Onestar, and Blackstar each took their respective places on the branches of Great Oak. Spiderleg's fur tingled with excitement. It had been a while since he had gone to a Gathering. Cloudtail sat on his left while his apprentice Mousepaw sat on his right.

"I can't believe it! This is my very first Gathering!" Mousepaw meowed, purring with glee.

"Yes," Spiderleg said, wrapping his tale around the younger tom, "it's about to begin soon though. And Blackstar doesn't take too kindly to cats who talk before we begin."

At that, Blackstar let out a loud hiss to a group of she-cat apprentices, who had been giggling quite loudly.

"See what he means?" Cloudtail asked, leaning past Spiderleg.

"Quiet!" Firestar commanded. His tone was so stately sounding that Spiderleg could feel Mousepaw tremble beside him. Once he was done reprimanding his own warriors, Firestar began to announce ThunderClan's news to the other Clans.

"I am proud to announce that ThunderClan is thriving well. We have plenty of prey and have five newly appointed apprentices: Berrypaw, Hazelpaw, Mousepaw, Cinderpaw, Honeypaw, and Poppypaw."

The cats of ThunderClan let out yowls of approval as the five apprentices looked bashful but delighted that their clan leader had recognized them. Leopardstar was the next to speak.

"RiverClan is surviving. But as it is the season of new leaf, Twolegs are starting to come back. The whooping of their kits scare the prey away, and they are loud all day," said Leopardstar.

"Tell them about that mouse-brained song they sing all day!" cried one of the RiverClan warriors. Leopardstar's chilling gaze was enough to make even a warrior quake. But seeing as how they led her into this, there was no way out.

"You must share this vital information, Leopardstar. After all, they could be the threat of all our clans!" Onestar said knowledgably. The spotted she-cat sighed loudly.

"Very well, here it goes," she said. Taking a deep breath, she shakily began to sing

_Spiderpig, Spiderpig!_

_Does whatever a Spiderpig does!_

_Can he swing?_

_From a web?_

_No he can't! _

_Cause he's a pig, look out! _

_He is Spiderpig!_

The cats stared blankly at her. No one knew what to make of it.

"That sounds like a load of fox dung to me!" mumbled Tawnypelt, who was sitting next to her brother Brambleclaw. Cries began to follow soon after hers.

"Who even understands half of the things Twolegs do?" asked Nightcloud from WindClan.

"The song is hideous when you have to listen to it all day!" Reedwhisker snarled. After all, he was a warrior of RiverClan.

"Perhaps it's a sign from StarClan!" offered Leafpool, who was the ThunderClan's medicine cat.

"LEOPARDSTAR'S SINGING VOICE RIVALS THOSE OF A SONGBIRD'S!" cried Smokefoot from ShadowClan. Every cat turned to stare at him as though he had given birth to a badger.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

The rest of the Gathering went on as normal, but there was still the matter of how to solve the Twoleg kits singing that strange song.

"We shall take action at the next Gathering if the problem continues," said Blackstar, "is that alright with you Leapordstar?"

"Alright. I guess in the meantime we have to cope," she said. Members of RiverClan groaned as they began to cross the fallen tree that served as a bridge to the island.

"At this rate, I wouldn't care if we had leaf bare year round! Then we wouldn't have to hear that stupid song!" Pebblepaw grumbled.

"Don't say such mouse-brained things!" Mosspelt scolded, cuffing her apprentice on the head.

"Don't you think the song is awful, Spiderleg?" Mousepaw asked as he landed gracefully onto the shore.

"Yes. I can see how it could bother RiverClan if the Twolegs sing it all the time," he said reasonably.

"I think the song is quite funny!" Cloudtail laughed, coming in between the two toms, "in fact, I noticed that whoever those Twolegs sing about sounds an awful lot like your name, Spiderleg!"

The black warrior grimaced. He didn't want the nephew of Firestar to be poking fun at him.

"Please don't," Spiderleg begged, hoping not to sound like a mewling kit. Cloudtail instead grinned mischievously and began to sing:

_Spiderleg! Spiderleg!_

_Does whatever a warrior cat does!_

_Can he swing? _

_From a web?_

_No he can't!_

_Cause he's a cat, look out!_

_He is Spiderleg!_

"Cloudtail!" Spiderleg moaned, cuffing the white warrior. Mousepaw chuckled slightly.

"You liked it?"

"Well, you have to admit it, it IS pretty funny," Mousepaw reasoned.

"No its not!" Spiderleg hissed.

Mousepaw and Cloudtail smirked at each other. They started to meow to the song, even louder this time. But it was badly out of tune. No matter how much he begged them to stop, they continued. And with that, Spiderleg had received his own song. It wasn't as honorable (or as annoying) as his warrior name, but it was a part of him now. And there was nothing he could do to change that.

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**A/N: Please review! This is my first Warrior fanfic and I want to know how I did! And since the Simpson movie came out in the summer, I could see kids singing it while on summer vacation, therefore explaining why RiverClan heard the song. **


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